February 20, 2013

  • In the game of Pin-The-Tail-On-The-Donkey there is always the ass where the tail is to be affixed.

    Welcome to Kansas, the proverbial ass end of the above mentioned game.

    The Kansas legislature is going to tackle some very important issues. For one, they want to exempt from Federal laws, and guns manufacture red in Kansas. Yeah! State’s rights! The same old mentality that brought us the American Un-Civil War a mere 152 years ago.

    Kansas wants a new abortion law that will make it illegal to have abortions for reasons of gender. ALA China, this is an essential fucking law to have. It will help us proclaim we are the stupidest state in the nation.

    We also have a bill proposing that if we teach global warming in the classroom, that optional theories must also be taught. This is silly because we all know that global warming is caused by god farts. Every time god has a greasy repast, he gets indigestion, then farts, and the weather changes. I mean, why teach what we already know!

    We have a governor who has gone to every corner of the state proclaiming is vision for improving the economy - a thing he failed to do here, thus far, and never did while in the U. S. Senate. We have since learned, earlier this month, that his financial figures have been based on a 2 billion dollar budget error. Oops. He has found someone in his administration to fall on that sword.

    Nationally, the U. S. Senate plays brinkmanship with the predicament (and the nation), with their ideological B. S. trumping reality, and trumping the seriousness of matters at hand.

    Is it impossible for American’s to find mature individuals to fill our senate? I’m not talking about age. Crap. Our senators are generally older than oatmeal and dinosaur eggs. I mean mentally mature individuals.

    I’ve been waiting for someone to return an over-due item to the library. A conscientious library would perhaps keep track of over-due items, then contact the patron to urge the return of the errant item in as timely a manner as possible. But this is Kansas. Our library staff meets each morning, lays hands on the book shelves, and prays that missing items be returned. It’s the only Christian way to handle things in Bishop Brownback’s kingdom.

    It is snowing outside my window. We should have 6-8 inches by tomorrow, maybe 12 + inches in other parts f the state. Snow is caused when polar bear farts encounter god’s hot beef and bean burrito farts converge somewhere in the north regions of Canada. (Who needs science?)